My menopause journey & tips to help
Following my interview on This Morning about my journey with menopause, I have been so incredibly overwhelmed with the feedback. I was very nervous to speak out, and I honestly did not expect that my story would impact so many people. I have since learned that I am far from unique, and that thousands of others are struggling with the effects of menopause, as I did.
Needless to say, I have received an abundance of messages and emails. Despite desperately wanting to respond to each individually, this was proving impossible, so I decided to create this blog to share what has worked for me, more about my journey, with avenues of help.
I really do hope that my response helps you, but if you have any more questions, please do join Nik and I on our Iive Q&A that we host every Monday evening:
Facebook at 8pm here
Instagram at 8:30pm here
My Symptoms
Before I even had any idea that I could possibly be in peri-menopause, my symptoms began with severe hair loss, weight gain, and the most awful joint pain, particularly in my feet and ankles. This then progressed to sleep issues, my psoriasis flared, and my eyes became very sensitive. As time passed, my mood dropped as I became very lethargic, and I started experiencing migraines and receiving a sensitivity to things I had previously been okay, with such as gluten, and eyelash glue.
Unbelievably, the two expected menopausal symptoms of hot flushes and periods stopping, did not happen to me. Yes, I occasionally felt a little warmer during the night, and yes my periods did become lighter, but this wasn't significant enough to red flag peri-menopause to me. In fact, if I’m honest I had never even heard the word 'peri-menopause' until I was given this label maybe 18 months after my first symptom started.
Diagnosis
By chance, I had a follow-up appointment with a gynaecologist after having ovarian cysts. During routine blood tests, she flagged to me something about my 'Follicle Stimulating Hormone (FSH) ' being high. I had never heard of that, and on further questioning, she casually said that I could be in peri-menopause. I was quite stunned as I hadn't even considered that before. She asked I return for follow-up comparable blood tests after which she confirmed I was peri-menopausal. I was prescribed a tablet form of HRT which allowed me to still have light periods. I wanted this as this was what felt normal to me. This HRT was called Femoston.
Telling Nik And My Children
I was in total shock to learn I was menopausal. I remember the exact moment I told Nik, and how upset I was that this must mean I had reached a pivotal aging moment in my life. I also felt embarrassed to admit I was peri-menopausal, as for me growing up, I was led to believe that menopause happened to ‘old’ ladies, not ladies in their prime, enjoying life, marriage, career and being a wife and Mum. Nik was fabulous. He duly cheered me up, reminding me of his aging niggles, and a spot on his skin that our friend (a dermatologist) explained “Nik in a nutshell, it’s an old bugger spot”. This made us both laugh.
I did very little research at the start, after all I believed my hair loss and lighter periods was all that could be attributed to menopause, and I should expect hot flushes in due course.
It was sometime before I shared that I was peri-menopausal with my children, and this was not until after I had far more answers. I would make light of it in my moments of forgetfulness, but when I did eventually explain to Olivia and Hunter that my moods and loss of memory were a consequence of menopause, they were both unphased by my news. As always they were super supportive, and helped me out many times with my memory lapses.
Medication
As my 76 year old mother was taking HRT and swore by it since her mid 40’s, when I was offered HRT, I accepted immediately. The first tablet I was prescribed was Femoston, and the dose was 1/10mg. The doctor suggested I started on a lower dose as there was only one dose stronger, and in her words ‘that gave me somewhere to go’.
Ten months passed and nothing changed, except my symptoms intensified. By now the weight gain and joint pain in my feet was particularly awful. I persevered but then returned to the doctor for the stronger 2/10mg dose of Femoston and was excited to change believing this was going to make everything better.
Sadly it did not and as a consequence, this made my mood plummet. I honestly felt devastated and bewildered. I felt my chance of improvement of getting back to the energetic, fun, positive, pain free woman I used to be had gone. This final higher dose did not help me. As Covid and lockdown ensued, this also exacerbated my mood and weight gain. However despite that I was still training hard and running, yet not a pound of weigh would budge. I did however know that body fat is essential for oestrogen, and so my body was storing and not letting go because it evidently was still not receiving an adequate supply.
Supplements
As the HRT wasn’t working for me, I did seek advice from a nutritional adviser at Holland and Barret. She gave me a concoction of supplements to help the symptoms I was feeling. Evening Primrose Oil, biotin and zinc for my hair loss, vitamin D and C for energy, glucosamine for joint pain, probiotics for a healthy gut and mind, and magnesium for sleep were just some of the supplements I took. (There are other supplements available for those unable to take HRT or alongside it such as black cohosh, sage, red clover and St John’s Wort. Do check that these are compatible with any medications or other health conditions as St John’s Wort particularly isn’t for everyone). I did feel a little better with supplements however and noticed my hair wasn’t now falling out but I was still not quite there.
Rock Bottom To Recovery
I felt that I had come to a point where I was now grieving the person I had once been. I spoke to Nik about whether perhaps acceptance of this new person was the best way to move forward. This Morning had also become a source of comfort and education, and I was very grateful for the information and phone ins. I particularly found Dr Louise Newson and Dr Nighat Arif very knowledgeable, which helped give me hope.
In my lowest moments, Nik would remind me to seek out and speak to other woman who had gone through their menopause successfully. One of these women was Davina McCall. I remember contacting Davina and telling her I had hit an all-time low and that I felt physically, mentally and emotionally broken. Davina instantly raised my spirits. She told me to download the Balance App and urged me to contact Dr Louise Newson’s menopause clinic – Newson Health even if for just one consultation.
Three months later, I was booked for a Zoom consultation with one of the doctors from Newson Health. I spoke to the doctor for 45 minutes, and came off the call feeling like someone had taken the hugest weight off my shoulders. I still remember the relief and happiness I felt being told I could get the old me back.
I learned that not everyone can absorb tablet form HRT, and I must have been one of those people. I was prescribed oestrogel gel which I started with 2 pumps but have now settled with 3.5 pumps every morning, 2 Utrogestan tablets at night (14 days on then 14 days off which after a year I now just take 1 every night) and Androfem cream (a female testosterone) which I rub into my bum every morning. Nik by coincidence had been talking to an endocrinologist (a medical specialist who treats people with a range of conditions that are caused by problems with hormones, such as diabetes, menopause and thyroid issues). The endocrinologist passed on some very valuable advice through Nik, being that whatever time you apply or administer your hormones – even if more than once per day – then this should be done around the same time to negate fluctuations, and therefore fluctuations in mood and symptoms.
Within 3 months the pain in my feet and ankles had stopped. Slowly my sleeping improved and my energy levels started to pick up.
The good news was that my doctor was able to prescribe everything for me, even testosterone but I returned to the Androfem via Newson Health, as this is specifically for women whereas the NHS version is for men – and thus you have to take a lesser dose.
As my mood lifted, I found I was working harder at the gym, lifting heavier weights. I started taking ashwagandha supplements around this time, and I noticed I was feeling better and better.
By chance, I spoke with a lady who had the loveliest figure. As I complemented her, she shared that she attributed her shape to yoga and Pilates. I had never done either, however as I couldn’t commit to classes, I just started with some YouTube beginners classes. Some I hated and some I enjoyed. I then created my own home yoga routine which I do about 3 times each week either before work, or after work before I cook dinner. Within weeks, I could see a significant change and improvement in my shape, weight and mood with yoga.
I had updated and reviewed every element of my life, however the one thing I hadn’t yet considered was my diet. I already didn’t drink alcohol, and haven’t eaten chocolate, meat or any dairy products (anything from a cow) in years, so I had to try something new. Nik had read about the benefits of intermittent fasting, and it was something that had been discussed on This Morning, and so he gave it a go, and started losing tummy fat. He starts eating at 12 noon and doesn’t eat after 8pm. However his diet didn’t change, just the hours so he still ate healthily. I then implemented the same eating hours as Nik, but also decided to cut out simple carbohydrates (basically anything with sugar) and gluten so I stopped eating bread and pastries. I do still however still eat a lot and drink lots of water.
In 9 months, all my perimenopausal weight has gone! All 24 pounds and I feel amazing. I do still eat really well and eat lots of natural seeds and nuts, avocado, eggs, salad, fruit and vegetables. At the weekend, I will eat more and even something unhealthy (chips and gravy from the chip shop mmmm) but truthfully I don’t crave anything unhealthy. I honestly haven’t changed how much I eat, just how I eat (albeit only in an 8 hour period) and I do, and will continue to share this on TikTok, Facebook and Instagram.
I feel as good as I did in my 30’s, and I really want everyone experiencing menopausal symptoms to know that you can get better, even if you are unable to take HRT as there’s many natural supplements. Diet, hydration, yoga, weights and mindfulness are all also important.
My Tips To You
If you have menopause symptoms, complete this questionnaire Balance - Menopause Symptom Questionnaire and take it to your GP.
Also, please take a look at the free Balance App Balance - balance app (balance-menopause.com)
If you are on HRT, be sure to apply it at the same time of day.
If nothing changes, then change the brand or way it is administered, for example, change tablets to gels, or patches, or sprays etc.
Lift weights
Try Yoga
Upgrade your diet. Eat less simple carbohydrates and less gluten.
Drink lots of water (and herbal teas)
Carry a notebook to jot things you need to remember – I called it my backup brain.
Speak to people who have got through the menopause and ask what worked for them.
Be informed. Telling your doctor that you are aware that NICE guidelines stipulate you are entitled to HRT if you are displaying menopausal symptoms (that’s where the above questionnaire comes in).
Here are the NICE guidelines Overview | Menopause: diagnosis and management | Guidance | NICE
Don’t make age an excuse. Whatever your aged (even under 50 or over 60), do not let your GP fob you off or insist that you have to have no period for 12 months before treatment as that’s not the case. Its when you’re having irregular or different periods that you’re in perimenopause and exactly when you need your doctors help. Also 1 in 100 women start menopause in their 40’s.
Please have a read of these informative websites. Information really is key in understanding how you feel and the help available to you;
The Menopause Charity - Menopause Facts, Advice and Support
Balance - Homepage (balance-menopause.com)
Overview - British Menopause Society (thebms.org.uk)
I really hope that helps and am sending you so much love.
Believe me, if I can get through it so can you. I will keep sharing helpful tips and films across our TikTok, Instagram and Facebook too.
